A moment of silence

How Baseball saved my life

The final game of the 2010 National League Series was a disappointment for Phillies fans, and certainly there is an endless variety of ways to ask many questions. Why couldn't the Phillies connect to the ball? Why did Ryan Howard stop being the powerhouse that all expected him to be? What happened to the home runs?  These are the questions I will leave to the sports experts and commentators who get paid to make up answers. For me, the question  was this:, What about being in a ballpark with 46,000 people was an essential part of healing from a traumatic injury that had kept me out of work for 6 weeks, and in pain for much longer than that?

On March 21,  2010 an accident at home sent me to the trauma unit at Einstein hospital. Although I didn't know it at the time, the top joint of my finger had been crushed and the nerves severed so badly that the damage was irreparable. As you read this, you may shutter thinking about the pain-so then, multiply that and you will get a tinge of how painful it was in reality. My world became bandages and medications, neighbors and friends helping me clean and cook, family staying with me, and much much love. I created visualizations of light and warmth and gratitude to use as meditations, which when recorded became my lullabies to sooth me to sleep. Bathed in this gratitude  I went into surgery on March 31, thanking everyone in my path from receptionists, to the nurses to the excellent surgeon.

From the time of the injury through this surgery and for weeks to come, I did not know the extent of the damage, never knew that my life had changed permanently.

I only knew  that on  April 14, I had precious tickets in the 11th row of the 3rd base line in Citizen's Bank Park to see the  Phillies Opening night game with my friends. I only knew that whatever the pain, and no matter how difficult, that game was going to stay on my schedule.

My hand bandaged, my bag packed with vicodin and aciteminophen, I took my seat cradled between two of my favorite Phillies phans.  I couldn't clap because the impact on my hand was like an electric shock. But I could stand up and wave, shout and scream.

Oh,  how I learned to let go  and scream.

Not for myself, though. No, I shouted for a team, and for a city and for the start of spring and expectations for summer; for hope and for excitement; for the open air, and balls sailing high into the sky; for running and stealing bases, for sliding into home, for grace and green; for the sun setting over the Philadelphia skyline; for silly antics on the field; for the ceremonial first pitch and the actual first pitch.

For all that and more I stood up, hands waving, becoming part of the community of fans.

Surrounded by  45,000 others screaming and and yelling, too, I  realized that it was safe expected even to make noise,  a lot of noise.  That night and the rest of the thrilling season of cheering, yelping, stomping  saved my life .

And I needed that.

The 95% of my body that wasn't hurt needed that. For the summer and well into fall, the places in me that had become small  filled the vast ballpark space with the joy of winning, the excruciating pain of losing,  the excitement at seeing a no hitter,  the awe at witnessing the ballet of an elegant catch in right field, the naughty delight of cheering on a runner as he stole a base, the tickle at being part of a 'wave' that spread throughout the stands, the silliness of singing at the 7th inning stretch.

And it helped to bring me into wholeness again.

That is why I am a Phillies phan.

3 for 3 Good weather, Good game. Good win.

On this last game of the 6 pack series that Peter and I bought in December (see blog post Dec 22), we are hopeful for a tri-fecta: good weather, a good game, a good win. After 2 days of solid rains that flooded Kelly Drive, each of us has packed our rain gear and umbrellas just in case. We know that the game will be played come hell AND high water because there just aren't any days to make up games this late in the season. Last night's chilly rain delay game makes tonight's nice weather all the more precious. When we arrive the sky is overcast,  but dry, with no sign of any downpour.

Good weather. 1 for 3.

This is an important game as the season comes into the 7th inning stretch. The pitching is well matched, so it is with anticipatory excitement that we stand up and cheer for Raul Ibanez' home run early on. The Braves match with a run and then surge ahead.

What happens in the 6th inning stirs up the crowd for the first time since the home run. Polanco hits a fly ball down the first base line. The right fielder dives to catch it, holding up his glove to show that he has made the out.. Victorino runs to 3rd, but looking back, thinks that it is the last out. As do we all. The Braves walk off the field, the Phillies prepare to change to defense.

But no! The umpires circle up to take a second look. Their decision: It was not caught, which means that there are still only 2 outs and the Phillies are still at bat.  We all go wild with disbelieve at this second chance, especially when it is followed by a rally  to put 3 men on base.

Okay, so it was all for nought, when Ryan Howard strikes out  for the 3rd out leaving the 3 men stranded. Still, this definitely gets our blood going again, which serves us well for the next half of the game.

There are other moments like this. Hits and disappointments, dynamic double plays, 3-2 counts that make me want to hide until its over, elegant right field catches,edge of the seat pitching duels. Section 431 collectively chanting throughout provides the musical entertainment along with great Latin music for Latino Heritage night.

All this  brings us to a tied 2-2 game going into the 9th inning. Are we looking at extra innings? The Braves are shut down by Madson and it is now our turn again.

Two men on base, Ross Gload comes to bat as the pinch hitter. He hits a lovely just-to-the -left-of-the-foul- line single.

Good weather. Good game.  2 for 3

The hit is enough to bring in another run making it 3-2 in the bottom of the  9th inning.

Good weather. Good game. A win for the Phillies.  3 for 3

But wait, there's more. I have not felt this end of the game exuberance since the playoff wins. We are all just giddy with delight, happy to see the brass band that serenades us after each game on our way to the subway. (Better heard here than seen)

Tonight I am prepared with some quarters for the basket to reward their persistence and fun spirit.

Then, just inside the subway station, we run into 2 Atlanta fans here from Alabama who joke around with Isaac about the coming post season. It is all smiles, good natured ribbing and a sign of good sportsmanship.

Good weather

Good game

A win for the Phillies

AND

Good sportsmanship

4 for 4.

Thanks Peter for a great season. (wink, wink, let's go to another game ...and what about the playoffs?)

Nature 2-Philadelphia 0

Few questions could start a conversation with a stranger with more immediacy last week than  "Where were you during the earthquake?" Whether in the subway or by the standing room only counters, chatting up the food vendors, or waiting in line for the bathroom, everyone  at the game had a story to tell. Admittedly, the most interesting were from people on higher floors in Center City. In fact, a friend who I saw the next day, was evacuated from  the 40th floor of the Comcast building, He definitely got the win.

I did feel the rumble in my first floor office, wondering if the students in the classroom next door were having a wild party. All the staff converged in the main teachers' room uncertain about what had just happened. And though the earthquake had lasted only a few seconds, it was as if we had experienced a devastating event. No books came off of shelves, no glasses crashed onto the floors. Still, an earthquake in Philadelphia? enough to keep us talking and even a bit anxious for the rest of the day.
Then just to keep us 'awake alert  alive enthusiastic' (thanks to my brother Marc for that delightful ditty), along comes Hurricane Irene with enough rain to wash out a few games, and to bring flooding to areas in the Delaware Valley.
Games postponed, roofs unhinged, creeks arisin' and the rain kept coming. Even Cliff Lee couldn't pitch his way out of such a storm.

Winning is Sweet

At the August 23 game I laughed more heartily than I had in a long time. Maybe it was the warmth of being with good  friends, the 15th row height of our 419 section seats just above home plate, or the great weather. Or it could have just been Shane Victorino's  home run, John Mayberry Jr's three run home run, Shane's three run triple, or watching this 'Mets men's group' on the mound. What are they saying anyway? "What the ### do we do now?", or "Stop being such sensitive new age men and start kicking butt", or "I hear they make great cheese steaks in this part of town, let's get outta here NOW." Whatever they were saying, it didn't matter 'cause at least tonight they were being out hit, out run, and eventually, out pitched.

Worley had a rough first two innings, getting out of some jams with some good defense from the infield and catches from the outfield. Once he settled down, though, his teammates  helped him out with a great batting barrage. Oh, and Worley hit some, too. Yeah, 2 out of 3 times at bat, and he came home on an RBI.
For a few innings we were up on our feet most of the time, screaming or clapping. How surprised we were to look back to see a fan sleeping through  most of the whole game

The only place the Mets showed up the Phillies was when they completed a 'hit and run'. Okay,  I didn't really know what that was, and had to use my oft said expression "What just happened?" So here is the explanation: A hit and run normally occurs when the coach sends the runner to 2nd while the batter attempts to hit the ball. If it works correctly the runner will get to third on a single (which happened) or he will get to 2nd and avoid the double play on a grounder to an infielder. (thanks Joe).

 That just went by too fast for me, but it was fun to watch.

This game made up for the torrential rain game last on the 18th, which was the first game that I had ever left before the end. We had seen the best 3 innings, the Phillies did eventually win it, and it was a good decision not wait out the 2 hour delay, but still left me disappointed. Tonight no rain, no delays, all fun.

Joe, Tobie, Vic, Peter, and an errant Red Sox fan.
 (Just behind Joe's head is the guy who slept through most of the game. His head is down in this picture!)

Winning IS sweet.